Make New York Post a Preferred Source Erin Benavides, the former wife of ex-NBA star Brent Barry, could have let a bombshell celebrity scandal define her life.
Instead, she left the tabloid firestorm behind her to build a career prosecuting gangbangers and advocating for society’s most vulnerable kids — valuable work she continued largely out of the public eye until she was tragically found dead by suicide last month.
For those who knew Benavides, her legacy has little to do with “Desperate Housewives” star Eva Longoria’s explosive 2010 allegations that she had an “emotional affair” with the actress’s then-husband, NBA Hall of Famer Tony Parker.
Instead, they remember a woman whose commitment to helping children endured even as her own personal life became tabloid fodder.
“Although she had something erupt in her life that seemed bigger and took a lot of attention away from what she did, she still regained her focus and went back to helping children,” said Yolanda Valenzuela, a nonprofit executive who worked alongside Benavides on the Bexar County Child Welfare Board when the scandal broke, to The Post.
When Longoria’s allegations thrust Benavides – then known as Erin Barry – into the national spotlight, she stepped away from her role on the welfare board.
“I think because she had to focus on her personal life at that time, she chose to leave,” Valenzuela said of Benavides, who died at 54 from an apparent self-inflicted gunshot wound inside her husband’s Port Aransas, Texas, home.
“We didn’t make her resign, by no means. She made that choice because she had other things to focus on in her life,” Valenzuela recalled, referring to Benavides’ divorce from Barry and also the care needed to raise their two sons, Quin and Cade.
The boys are now 26 and 20 years old, respectively.
But Benavides’ departure from the board was far from the end of her work with children.
She had already spent years advocating for at-risk youth, a passion that led her to represent Bexar County’s Blue Ribbon Task Force at the Texas House in 2005 and, two years later, to earn the US Congressional Award for Angels in Adoption in 2007.
During her 13-year marriage to Barry — who was born in Hempstead, Long Island, and played for teams such as the San Antonio Spurs — the A-list couple also launched the Spurs Foundation, an initiative to help children in protective services.
In her one and only public statement addressing the scandal, Benavides vehemently denied the accusations, writing: “I DID NOT HAVE AN AFFAIR WITH TONY PARKER, nor did I ‘pursue’ Tony Parker.”
She expressed frustration that the controversy was distracting from the child-advocacy work that had long been her priority.
“I am so busy with my children and law school studies that to take even a few moments out of my day to address this ludicrous issue is an annoyance,” her statement read.
“I have spent my adult life fighting for children who have been victimized so forgive me for not caring when someone tells me that my name is being dragged through the mud.
“Salacious rumors are not what keep me awake at night. What keeps me awake is wondering how the 5-year-old who was taken away from her abusive family is sleeping during her first night in a children’s shelter,” she said, adding that her own sons and studies were also among her priorities at the time.
“Being a first year law student is much scarier than dealing with gossip!” the advocate said.
That same year, Benavides enrolled at St. Mary’s University School of Law, a decision that paved the way for her later career as a Texas prosecutor.
She graduated with her J.D. in 2013 and spent two years as an assistant criminal district attorney in Bexar County, followed by three years as a staff attorney within the county’s juvenile probation department, according to her LinkedIn profile.
She later joined Texas’ 38th Judicial District, which serves Uvalde and Real counties, as an assistant district attorney in its anti-gang and border prosecution unit.
Benavides resigned in August, just two months before her death.
“During her time in my office, Erin diligently worked through the outstanding number of pending smuggling cases,” wrote her former boss, 38th Judicial District Attorney Christina Mitchell, in an Oct. 30 Facebook tribute.
“In addition to her earnestness and hard work, Erin brought much joy, laughter, and mirth to the office,” Mitchell said, adding that Benavides “would often give words of support and encouragement to staff…and, sometimes, even to defendants.”
Benavides also “loved her boys and always shared, with such pride, their accomplishments,” Mitchell added.
From 2020 to 2022, Benavides also served as president and CEO of the now-shuttered Youth Center of Texas, a nonprofit that provided 24-hour crisis intervention, long-term case management and other services to child sex-trafficking victims, her LinkedIn profile shows.
In addition, she spent years working to expand resources for children in crisis, including laying the groundwork for a special nursery – a safe haven where parents could bring their kids during emergencies – in Bexar County, according to Valenzuela, who currently serves as the executive director of Kym’s Angels Foundation.
Valenzuela recalled Benavides working tirelessly to ensure mass-adoption ceremonies and Christmas fundraisers for local foster children were successful, too.
She said she believes that Benavides’ passion for helping vulnerable youth stemmed, in part, from her own childhood. Born to a single teenage mother in California, Benavides was adopted into another family at an early age.
“Her heart, because of her particular circumstances, I think that’s what laid the groundwork for the impact she had in regards to all this,” Valenzuela told The Post.
Benavides also quietly rebuilt her personal life, marrying San Antonio lawyer Pablo “Paul” Benavides in June 2022, according to the Uvalde Leader-News.
Paul Benavides – whose practice areas include oil and gas and real estate at Martin & Drought PC – was listed as the owner of the home where his wife was found dead, according to a police report obtained by The Post. He did not return messages.
Though Benavides largely disappeared from the national spotlight after the 2010 scandal, she remains well known for her positive impact on Texas communities.
“She was already very much in the limelight in San Antonio because of what she does. She was really known for great stuff,” Valenzuela said.
