Make Page Six a Preferred Source Murray Hill’s jovial persona as the self-proclaimed “hardest-working middle-aged man in show business” belies a dark past that includes alcoholism and a stint in a psych ward.
In his newly released memoir, “Showbiz! My Life as a Middle-Aged Man,” Hill reflects on the hard times in his 30s, which began with a slow descent into excessive drinking influenced by his Hollywood lifestyle.
“Show business or the music industry or comedy, whatever, it’s like a lot of people do drink; it’s part of the lifestyle,” the “Somebody Somewhere” alum, 54, told Page Six in a recent exclusive interview.
“You’re out every night, you’re in the clubs, you’re at bars. In some ways, to me, alcohol is like a silent killer because it’s progressive …it’s a progressive addiction, so it gets worse and worse.”
Hill explained the liquid escalation was “not fun,” explaining that “it’s not partying” and “it does all kinds of damage.
“When you get chemically addicted, it’s very hard to get out of that. Like you have to get help,” he reflected.
But alcoholism came with its own worsening side effects as the normally upbeat cabaret performer became frighteningly depressed.
“I was at a very low point,” he shared. “I was in this deep depression, and all jammed up with, like, because alcoholism is progressive. When I got to the end of that, I had no pilot light. It was like barely on.
“So there was no hope; I didn’t have any personality left. It was very depressing. So, you know, I didn’t want to go through that anymore. I didn’t want to be like that because I felt like it wasn’t me, and it freaked me out.”
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Ultimately, in an attempt to climb out of that hole, Hill checked himself into a psych ward in 2014, which led to sobriety.
“I never want to go back. I have not touched a drink since then,” the “Life & Beth” alum exclaimed.
“And so maybe it was good in that way to go through that awful experience there because, you know, it’s still in my head like I don’t want to go back there. ‘Why?’ Cause it was so scary.”
“Showbiz! My Life As a Middle-Aged Man” is out now.
